The passing this week of Archbishop Desmond Tutu brings a flood of memories of an amazing man and a remarkable chapter in history.  I was in South Africa from 1989 to 1995 and witnessed him in action on many occasions.   

For anyone committed to leading peaceful change in organizations, communities, or nations, there's much to learn from Tutu's life about how to be effective in human transformation.

In the framework of conflict styles, Tutu was strong in multiple styles.  He was often pushy - the Directing style. 

But he was just as often the opposite - gentle, sensitive, and caring - the Harmonizing style.

Often he was both at once!  In conflict styles language, that's the Cooperating or Collaborating style, simultaneously committed to one's own agenda and to the agendas of others.  So he was bold, strong, and outspoken as a leader for justice, yet consistently compassionate and responsive to the needs of others, including the white communities who in the beginning despised and feared him. 



There were many wonderful consequences.  One was he was earned the trust and respect of many South Africans, including many whites, and he was often a bridge between groups in volatile situations (including, late in his life, warring politicians in an electoral conflict in neighboring Lesotho).



Perhaps even more important, his Cooperating style helped unify his own fractured constituencies.  A largely unrecognized reality of longstanding social and political conflict is polarization within each side.  Wherever there's a big liberation or political struggle (including here in the US right now) you will find deep division among supposed "partners in arms".   South Africa's liberation movement was terribly, sometimes murderously splintered from the 1970s onwards.



So Tutu's Cooperating style of leadership was a tremendous gift of unity to the movement itself.  He initiated many things, but he never owned them.  He worked hard, but he didn't clamor for credit.  He delegated leadership and authority. 

On a personal note: Though in gatherings where Tutu spoke from time to time, I never worked directly with "the Arch" in my South Africa years.  But later, in 2012 he accepted the request of Heads of Churches of Lesotho, with whom I was working at that time, to help secure commitment of politicians to an Electoral Code of Conduct.  I've published memories from my journal of an amazing day at this link.